Being Dianne

Author: Qarnita Loxton
Publisher: Kwela
​Reviewer: Nancy Richards
​Let me first admit that I have huge respect for Qarnita Loxton – practiced as an attorney, studied psychology, worked as executive coach – but you can read all that in the blurb at the back of her latest book. But my respect is born from the fact that she is unpretentious (despite the success she’s had with her Being books), she’s openhearted and minded, stylish, funny and, judging from this latest book, filled with insight.
So Being Dianne follows on from the series  

featuring friends Kari, Lily and Shelley – you may know this/have read them – if not, you can catch up now. But notable about Qarnita and this book specifically, is that through Dianne, her divorce from the unlikeable Alan, her desperate attempts to reach her clammed-up teenage daughter Kate to discuss issues of same-sex relationships, or anything else for that matter, not to mention her own multiple, complicated and colourful relationships (why she ever married the narrow, mealy-mouthed Alan is a mystery), she addresses so many enormously contemporary social conundrums.
There are some agonizing conversations between characters – both deep and slight, a very recognizable, revealing and expletive-laden friends @HELP WhatsApp group with from-the-hip advice, some killer confrontations and a jaw-dropping, very public confession that can only be described as… sjoe, out there! The local Cape Town settings, in the city centre, Blouberg, Noordhoek, Waterfront Primi etc, and not least the very real and much-loved Book Lounge in Roeland St, scene of a catalytic Teen Pride meeting, make it extraordinarily relatable for many of us Mother City residents  – but not exclusive. What she’s dealing with here is universal first-world.
Putting it all into bang-up-to-date context, there’s even an emerging COVID lockdown backdrop – she claims in fact that writing Dianne kept her sane during the chaos of 2020. But the sense I get about Qarnita is that she inhales the world around her - the dialogue, the mood, mixed-upness, the pain, passions and peccadillos - processes it all and wraps it neatly in a package of humour and empathy. And while she liberally credits all the people who have helped her craft this and all the other Being books – she is undoubtedly the chief cook who has so perfected the Being recipe. ​